So, I had planned to tell you about going to the fair on Monday. It was fun. I'll show you some pictures later. But, that's not what's on my mind tonight. This week has been mostly rotten. After pumpkin picking, our attitudes (both Levi's and mine) took a serious nose dive. Tantrums and whining are at an all time high. The drama!!!! Levi is compassionate and loving and sweet and all sorts of wonderful, but he is also extraordinarily high maintenance. And, since Sophia's 5th week that aspect of Levi is outshining everything else. Yesterday, I thought maybe we were back to normal, but today proved me wrong. I'm trying to remember that ALL things must end....so surely this too will pass....surely.....right?
Ugh. In the meantime, I'm operating on very little sleep (thank you, colic.) and my ability to be a kind, patient, and compassionate mother is being seriously tested. Also, I am failing...regularly. Double ugh. I suppose it would be unacceptable to hang him up by his toenails and leave him there? Yeah. I thought so.
Big hugs to you xx You are NOT failing!! You are good enough and sometimes good enough is all we can be to get through the tough times. Its ok not to be awesome all the time especially when you are running on empty while doing the hardest job in the world xx Hope things start easing for you, its really tough sometimes huh :)
ReplyDeleteUgh. You are not alone. In the rotten week or feeling the way you do at this point with #2. I had a very difficult time until #2 was ~6mo. It took that long for us to all adjust. Sophia is just around the age where Levi realizes she isn't going away. It does get better and then it rolls in waves for a long time.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Nicola
I'm going through the same thing i think i had to appolojize to jaime for yelling "jaime Nooo i just(insertrecently undone thing here)" and grunting (im so horible at biting my tongue) like a billion times today (i was trying to get the house cleaned, because this morning was a bust, and he wanted to watch movies all day,(not going to happen 2 yearold!)he also apologized for taking off his poopie nappy,smacking me when i said no and tearing up behind me...at the end of the day i'm glad it happened so next time i know what to look for before i reach the point of no return... but OH THE GUILT!!! its overwhelming, Well both try better tomorrow i guess
ReplyDeleteSweet blog.
ReplyDeleteI remember those days, when my kids were younger. The best mothers are always the ones that feel the most guilt.
hang in there!
I feel the exact same way with my 2 1/2 year old. Right now I am out of ideas on how to handle his behavior. I've tried everything! This too shall pass....right?
ReplyDeleteYucky. I hope you have had a better day since this post. I remember some very hairy times when I brought Jem home and Caleb (who was around the same age as Levi) went nutso for a few months- not at all toward Jemima, but definitely toward me! He was horrible! I remember feeling awful for just being so shouty all the time.
ReplyDeleteThis time around with Eve joining our clan has been easier but it is still very challenging (there have been tears (mine)!
But it does pass... My "baby" Jemima is coming up for 4...
Oh honey... it passes. Adding a life into the family is such a big adjustment for everyone. Boundaries are different, time is different, love is the same but patience is torn in a million directions.
ReplyDeleteIt gets better. I swear it does. There are still moments where I look around and think "why did we think this was a good idea??" but they are much fewer and farther inbetween.
Sending you some love...
I love when I see these posts, I feel for you, but it makes me feel sane knowing that I am not the only one that goes through this.
ReplyDeleteI just left our favorite lunch spot carrying Audrey screaming and kicking!!!
Hang in there mama!!!
Just read this (it's been a busy week)Don't feel like a failure we all have weeks like that you should have seen the day I had today with Lilly.
ReplyDeleteStubborn defiant dig your heels in clashing of wills with a 5 year old, not pretty and if I sit and dwell on it I will end up totally embarrassed and ashamed by the way I handled a lot of those moments today. So I'm not going to, I'm going to take a breath, do something that will make me smile and choose to believe that tomorrow will be better.
I know you wrote this awhile ago and I hope your tomorrows have been better since but if Levi came home cranky or the sleep deprivation is winning then here is a video for you. Watch it it's cool.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qybUFnY7Y8w
Sarah, that is a cool video. Thanks for the link!
ReplyDeleteAnd, Levi has actually been in a much better mood since he came home. I think he was just coming to grips with things changing.